Seeing the Divine

This week’s Torah portion is Vayishlach, which means and he sent. Jacob, with his wives and children, is very relieved to have left his father-in-Law Laban, after having worked for Laban 20 years. Jacob is on his way back to Canaan, only to have to confront his twin brother Esau, who he wronged all those years ago. He sends messengers ahead, who report back that Esau is on his way to meet him with a force of 400 men. Afraid of a battle, he divides his camp in two, prays to God for rescue, and sends Esau presents. The night before the confrontation, the text tells us, “Jacob was left alone and a man wrestled with him until the break of dawn.” Neither one could overpower the other. Jacob receives a wound: the temporary dislocation of his hip; and a name change: Israel, one who wrestles with God, as the man says, “for you have striven with the Divine and with man and have overcome.” Jacob asks for and receives a blessing, after which he meets Esau in peace, and is able to say to him, “If I have now found favor in your eyes, then accept my tribute from me inasmuch as I have seen your face, which is like seeing the face of a Divine being, and you were appeased by me.” Jacob leaves and subsequently, arrives, we are told, “intact” in Canaan.

This encounter raises many questions. Who was the man? Who won the match? What was won and what was lost? One thing seems certain: that Jacob was sent this contest just at the time he needed it. It was the first time in his life he could not trick his way out of a difficult situation nor could he run away. His struggle then, was with his own integrity: an engagement to find his true self. One of my favorite sages, called the S’fat Emet wrote, “God’s glory can’t be revealed in this world so long as Amalek exists (P. 49).” The Amalekites attacked us just as we were coming out of Egypt and victimized the weak, the ill, the very young, and the very old. Amalek represents causeless hatred, cowardice, and all the qualities within us that are less worthy: what I call, those corners of our personality we don’t bother to sweep, and that Carl Jung referred to as the Shadow.

Perhaps the man Jacob wrestled with was an angel who represented his Shadow – his inner crummy-ness. We are told by the text that he overcame. Just by engaging himself and being willing to grow, he won. Although he experienced the pain of his dislocated hip, he requested and received a blessing. Rashi says it was a blessing he earned and not one he stole, it being received not through treachery and deceit, but through authority. Because he was willing to stay in the conflict and do the inner work to find his pure self, he overcame; and the dawn revealed to him the Face of the Divine.

But that’s only half of the story. Rabbi Menachem Mendel, the Lubavitcher Rebbe said, “Everyone is a shaliach, an agent of God...Our mission includes the empowerment of others.” The proof of Jacob’s growth was not only his bringing himself to meet Esau, but his ability to see the Divine in Esau’s face: seeing God in his worst enemy, who was also his brother. After his struggles brought him the inner peace he sought, he was able to bring that harmony and contentment to his relationship with Esau. His struggles were private. They were real, as evidenced by the wound. His pain was hidden, but the peace he achieved was revealed: in his enhanced ability to give and receive love.

This is the model of growth done correctly: by engaging ourselves, which is always an equal contest, we can bring the inner Divinity we share to others. Once we find the true, Divine self, our radiance can be seen reflected in the faces of those we see. We know we cannot change others: we can only change ourselves. When we do, our relationships with others are transformed. May the holy work we undertake lead us on a journey to behold our own goodness. May we encounter God’s Divinity within, and may we share that great blessing with everyone we meet.