Spiritual Completion & How We Grow

This week’s Torah portion is Toldot, which means offspring. It tells of Isaac and Rebecca’s family and the birth of Rebecca’s twins. The first baby to be born was covered in red hair, so they named him Esau. Rashi says everyone called him Esau because he was fully made, completed. Esau comes from the verb ASA, to do or to make, and Esau was also a doer: a man of action. Jacob was born second, grasping Esau’s heel, and he was named Yaakov, heel or that which follows. The JPS commentary also links Yaakov to the Semitic word for protection, a plea for Divine shelter and blessing. The Torah gives a brief description of the two boys. About Esau it says, Esau became one who knows trapping, a man of the field. The description for Jacob reads, and Jacob was a quiet man, abiding in tents. Not all translations say quiet. Rashi says wholesome. The Women’s Torah commentary says homespun. Another translation is mild. But the Hebrew says, Tam. Tam literally means finished, perfect, complete whole, innocent, or simple. It is the same word used for the Simple Son in the section of the Passover Hagaddah that tells of the four children, or the four sons. The simple son is the one who is Tam: whole or complete. We can see that Jacob and Esau were very different, but that each was complete in his own way. Esau is physically complete and ready for action. Jacob’s completeness is more about inner resources, the ability to be quietly alone, to be a thinker, the ability to meditate, the ability to be in relationship with people and not only with things; but also he is a planner and a schemer. Neither boy had it all, but each was described as being complete. Their completeness brings us back to a verse in B’reisheet: “The heavens and the earth were finished and all their array. By the seventh day God completed the work which God had done, and abstained on the seventh day from all the work which God had done. God blessed the seventh day and sanctified it because on it God abstained from all the work which God created to make.” The verb, to make, Laasot, is puzzling. The end of the quotation should say, that God Made. To make, points us into the future. From this our sages derive the principle of Shutfei Elohim, being in partnership with God. My teacher, Rabbi Gelberman expressed it this way: God said, nothing I do anymore will be done alone. From now on we will finish the work of creation together. And this is precisely the case for Jacob and Esau, and also for us. We are born perfect and complete, just as creation was perfect and complete after the sixth day of creation. But we are also incomplete. The S’fat Emet expresses this in another way: “All things are brought into being by God. But the point is hidden and we have to expand it. This depends upon the point within us, for the more we expand our own souls, the more God is revealed to us in every place.” We are meant to be a work in progress that we, ourselves are bringing to completeness with our Divine partner. Or rather, that God is bringing to completeness with us as a willing or unwilling partner. Jacob and Esau are again instructive. As young men, their lack of a trusting, loving relationship is obvious. Esau’s anger and hostility toward Jacob for stealing the blessing and Jacob’s scheming, manipulative nature, his willingness to trick his way through life and run away from his problems repulse us. But their actions should give us great hope. Who of us doesn’t cringe at things we have done when we were younger, or even last year? If Jacob and Esau can become holy, so can we. As middle aged men, in next week’s Torah portion, Jacob and Esau have left their infantile selves, having done the inner work that allows them to express their love for each other and to see Divinity in each other’s faces, reestablishing their deep bond of understanding and caring for each other. We, too, are being led on a path of spiritual growth and development. Just as we have an innate program of physical development that unfold in our bodies, so we have an innate program of spiritual development that unfold in our souls. The events of our lives, our choices, and our feelings about our choices and those events are the engine which propels our growth. Each experience is an opportunity or test for us to choose with love, caring, and generosity. Each choice comes with the feedback of our feelings about how we have used the gift of free will. This is the creation of new Torah within us every day. This is how God communicates with us. Each new day is an opportunity to triumph over our yesterday’s selves. We may lose the contest numerous times before we are ready to advance. But we will surely advance, for we are being led by the Eternal One toward perfection, wholeness and the spiritual simplicity of pure love. Flawed as we are, Jacob and Esau teach us that each of us can attain great spiritual heights. Our sages said, “The offspring of the righteous are good deeds.” May we participate eagerly and fully in our growth toward righteousness, and may all our choices be deeds and words and thoughts of holiness and love.